Today is the day i really, really learn about love.
The day i learned that love is not something that i should just give to anyone easily.
I learned that i need to be more careful about giving my heart away to someone.
Because love comes with lots of downside.
Once you're vulnerable, you will lose your goddamn sense.
Just like the quotes says.. love makes you do stupid things.
For the people i hurt in the process of loving him, I am truly sorry.
I was so in love with him i neglected other's feelings.
I was so in love with him, i was more than ready to burn all the bridges that's been built, for the sake of salvaging this relationship.
I was so in love with him, i accepted everything. I accepted him, all the good and the bad. I accepted all of his treatments, all the good and the bad.
I was so in love with him, i trusted everything that he said.
I was so in love with him, i am ready to lose myself in order to understand him better.
I was so in love with you.
I was so in love with you, i neglected my own feelings and cared for yours more than anything.
I was so in love with you, i accepted all the hell you put me through.
Baby i was there when you needed to get away, i was with you when you said you don't want to meet her and decided to go to Jakarta instead.
Baby i was there listening to all of your stories. I was just a stranger, you see. But i was there, i was there for you, i was ready to love you, i was ready to be the one who can understand you, i liked you that much that i was willing to do it all for you.
I was so in love with you, I accepted all the judgments your friends and family made of me.
Did i ever get mad when they judge me as a bad person? No i have never. Because i loved you enough to feel that no matter what people think of me, it doesn't matter, our relationship is only between the two of us anyways, your validation was all i needed.
I was so in love with you, i don't ever get mad even when sometimes all you ever talked about is yourself when i wanted to be heard as well but i figure i should let you talk, i love listening to you talk, but it gets tiring as i wait for my turn to be heard.
I was so in love with you, i always try my hardest to make time for you.
I was so in love with you, i was okay when you were not there during the most important times of my life.. i decided to understand instead of being disappointed of the fact that you weren't there.
Even though i know, when someone really loves you.. they will put on that extra effort, but no, instead of sulking, i accepted and i chose to understand the circumstances instead.
I was so in love with you, i was okay when you were not there when i needed you the most. You knew i was alone by myself and i couldn't get home, and you said you feel bad.. but you didn't put effort to actually pick me up and drive me home, and i was okay, it must've been an important dinner.
I never got mad about it.
I was so in love with you, i accepted everything about you, i chose to understand you even when it is beyond my comprehension, i chose to care for you instead of blaming you.
I was so in love with you, i trusted you enough not to do anything funny behind my back. Even when you followed that girl's instagram truly knowing that your friend wanted to set you up with her.
I was so in love with you that during the 3 months we were together, i trusted you enough that i was willing to be really vulnerable. It was a big deal, you see. being vulnerable.
I was so in love with you that i was even willing to burn the bridges ive been trying so hard to build.
You see, i left my best friends for you. I got into a fight with my best friend of 3 years for you even when he's been in my life longer than you ever did, even when he understood me better than you did, but i left him for you, because i was so in love with you.
I am sorry about the deleted message we fussed about. I used to talk to you about everything, and i mean everything but sometimes i forget that it might hurt your feelings too... but i was truly telling you everything. That's why when another man texted me, i decided to hide it because im afraid it will hurt your feelings.. there is really nothing going on between us, literally nothing. i am sorry that my love for you is not convincing enough for you to trust my words.
I am sorry about me being drunk, and putting you through all that even when you have a big test coming up.
I am sorry about me still talking to the guy who doesn't see your worth like i do, he has his reasons too you see, he knows our history.. about you still having a girlfriend yet you still hit me up. But he truly is just a friend, you see, he just doesn't want me to get hurt, that's all.
I am sorry for hurting you.
I am very sorry.
But you see, the fact that all of those insignificant reasons are enough for you to dump me. Even when i have loved you with every fiber of my body.
Even when i was truly ready to give up everything just to be with you.
You dumped me,so very easily.
It hurts, it hurts me to the core.
I gave you everything i had, i guess it wasn't enough.
I am so hurt... so hurt.
Everything hurts.
I don't show it, but it hurts. It hurts me so very deeply that after all that I've sacrificed for you, you still dumped me.
But i am recovering.
I am in the process of loving myself again
I am in the process of finding myself again.
It hurts, love hurts.. so very badly.
I was so in love with you but you dumped me so easily, even when you disappoint or treated me bad.. i never see it as a reason to leave you. I was so committed to you that i accepted everything, but you couldn't do the same, even after everything i did for you.
It fucking hurts.. it will always be.
But i had enough. I had enough of all this.
I needed you gone from my life because you've made so worthless, even after all that talk about getting married and commitment.. you still dumped me at the end.
Now leave me alone, I am going to mend every pieces of my heart that you've broke into one piece again.
It truly fucking hurts..
The day i learned that love is not something that i should just give to anyone easily.
I learned that i need to be more careful about giving my heart away to someone.
Because love comes with lots of downside.
Once you're vulnerable, you will lose your goddamn sense.
Just like the quotes says.. love makes you do stupid things.
For the people i hurt in the process of loving him, I am truly sorry.
I was so in love with him i neglected other's feelings.
I was so in love with him, i was more than ready to burn all the bridges that's been built, for the sake of salvaging this relationship.
I was so in love with him, i accepted everything. I accepted him, all the good and the bad. I accepted all of his treatments, all the good and the bad.
I was so in love with him, i trusted everything that he said.
I was so in love with him, i am ready to lose myself in order to understand him better.
I was so in love with you.
I was so in love with you, i neglected my own feelings and cared for yours more than anything.
I was so in love with you, i accepted all the hell you put me through.
Baby i was there when you needed to get away, i was with you when you said you don't want to meet her and decided to go to Jakarta instead.
Baby i was there listening to all of your stories. I was just a stranger, you see. But i was there, i was there for you, i was ready to love you, i was ready to be the one who can understand you, i liked you that much that i was willing to do it all for you.
I was so in love with you, I accepted all the judgments your friends and family made of me.
Did i ever get mad when they judge me as a bad person? No i have never. Because i loved you enough to feel that no matter what people think of me, it doesn't matter, our relationship is only between the two of us anyways, your validation was all i needed.
I was so in love with you, i don't ever get mad even when sometimes all you ever talked about is yourself when i wanted to be heard as well but i figure i should let you talk, i love listening to you talk, but it gets tiring as i wait for my turn to be heard.
I was so in love with you, i always try my hardest to make time for you.
I was so in love with you, i was okay when you were not there during the most important times of my life.. i decided to understand instead of being disappointed of the fact that you weren't there.
Even though i know, when someone really loves you.. they will put on that extra effort, but no, instead of sulking, i accepted and i chose to understand the circumstances instead.
I was so in love with you, i was okay when you were not there when i needed you the most. You knew i was alone by myself and i couldn't get home, and you said you feel bad.. but you didn't put effort to actually pick me up and drive me home, and i was okay, it must've been an important dinner.
I never got mad about it.
I was so in love with you, i accepted everything about you, i chose to understand you even when it is beyond my comprehension, i chose to care for you instead of blaming you.
I was so in love with you, i trusted you enough not to do anything funny behind my back. Even when you followed that girl's instagram truly knowing that your friend wanted to set you up with her.
I was so in love with you that during the 3 months we were together, i trusted you enough that i was willing to be really vulnerable. It was a big deal, you see. being vulnerable.
I was so in love with you that i was even willing to burn the bridges ive been trying so hard to build.
You see, i left my best friends for you. I got into a fight with my best friend of 3 years for you even when he's been in my life longer than you ever did, even when he understood me better than you did, but i left him for you, because i was so in love with you.
I am sorry about the deleted message we fussed about. I used to talk to you about everything, and i mean everything but sometimes i forget that it might hurt your feelings too... but i was truly telling you everything. That's why when another man texted me, i decided to hide it because im afraid it will hurt your feelings.. there is really nothing going on between us, literally nothing. i am sorry that my love for you is not convincing enough for you to trust my words.
I am sorry about me being drunk, and putting you through all that even when you have a big test coming up.
I am sorry about me still talking to the guy who doesn't see your worth like i do, he has his reasons too you see, he knows our history.. about you still having a girlfriend yet you still hit me up. But he truly is just a friend, you see, he just doesn't want me to get hurt, that's all.
I am sorry for hurting you.
I am very sorry.
But you see, the fact that all of those insignificant reasons are enough for you to dump me. Even when i have loved you with every fiber of my body.
Even when i was truly ready to give up everything just to be with you.
You dumped me,so very easily.
It hurts, it hurts me to the core.
I gave you everything i had, i guess it wasn't enough.
I am so hurt... so hurt.
Everything hurts.
I don't show it, but it hurts. It hurts me so very deeply that after all that I've sacrificed for you, you still dumped me.
But i am recovering.
I am in the process of loving myself again
I am in the process of finding myself again.
It hurts, love hurts.. so very badly.
I was so in love with you but you dumped me so easily, even when you disappoint or treated me bad.. i never see it as a reason to leave you. I was so committed to you that i accepted everything, but you couldn't do the same, even after everything i did for you.
It fucking hurts.. it will always be.
But i had enough. I had enough of all this.
I needed you gone from my life because you've made so worthless, even after all that talk about getting married and commitment.. you still dumped me at the end.
Now leave me alone, I am going to mend every pieces of my heart that you've broke into one piece again.
It truly fucking hurts..
Komentar